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Myths About Military Spouses

military spouse myths

Military Spouse Myths

Becoming a military spouse can be daunting. Moving away from the family and friends you grew up with and in some cases, leaving the comforts of your own country, can be stressful. Many people do not realize that all military spouses are different. Each spouse has their own way of living, making for conflicting rumors within the spouses circle.

Though it may be intimidating to attend your first spouses club meeting or just attending a family day at the unit, there is truly nothing to be afraid of. Most spouses want to help make the transition as smooth as possible for you, but it is important to debunk the myths that have been floating around the military since its beginning.

Military Spouses Are Happy All the Time

Even if it does seem this way, military spouses are just as human as spouses of civilians. They still get stressed out about moving across the country, or seeing their loved one get deployed to an undisclosed location but they seem to do it with a smile on their face. They feel the need to be the rock in their family, showing their children or outsiders that everything is going great, even though on the inside they could be just as sad or worried as everyone else. Showing your confidence and positive attitude is great, but it is also important to express the not so positive emotions. There are always other spouses to lean on who understand exactly what you are going though, and they are very likely to lend a helping hand when need be.

Military Spouses All Want (or Have) Children

Though it may seem that way, not every military spouse wants or has children. There are many couples that want to wait to grow a family outside the military so they are able to be in one place for a long time and be around family. There are also plenty of families that just want to keep dogs or cats as children while they are in the military. Other couples do not want children at all or have children that have already left home. Every family is unique in the military and it is important to know that there are spouses of all ages, don’t be afraid to make friends with someone that is older or younger than you!

Military Spouses Are All The Same

Back to the point about all spouses are from different areas of the country, or even the world. Each spouse was raised differently, and is entitled to their own views. Many people have their own way of meeting friends and creating relationships that last, some will go to the gym and others will become friends with the active duty service members. There are many different types of people you will meet and being open minded to a friendship that you wouldn’t traditionally make can be a lifesaver.

Military Spouse Are Never Employed

Yes it may be difficult to find a hold onto an employment opportunity due to the constant moves, but it is not impossible. Many military spouses find employment online so they can keep their job with them, no matter where they end up. Other spouses will continue education and attend local or online universities to keep improving themselves. Many spouses will get into a field that will allow them to find an opportunity even with the constant changing schedule. It is also important to remember that with constant travel and moving to new and exciting places, there is always a way to boost your resume and get a unique experience.

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Military Spouses Are Overly Concerned About Rank and Job Title

There may be a few spouses that are concerned, but for the most part, it doesn’t matter who you become friends with. The rank of your spouse may have an influence on who you become friends with due to the fact that those people are going to be the ones that your spouse will befriend but, there is no written rule for spouses. Becoming friends with someone who has a spouse that is a sergeant, while your spouse is a second lieutenant may sound weird but odds are you may be the same age and have the same interest. With an already small community, why dwindle it down?

 

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About the author

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Lori Waddell serves as Co-director of an emergency response COAD in Montana, a freelance writer, and an Air Force Key Spouse. She is passionate about empowering communities and individuals through knowledge and resources. She currently lives in Montana with her husband and two children.